The one thing everyone in the world searches for. (Together with love) There is this constant want to be happy and to make the ones we love, happy too. Life throws in its mixes of this that and the other but through it all, if we’re happy at the end of the day, it’s all worth it!

Smile, Laugh, Have Fun! Be Happy!So many people get caught up in the rut of, “I’ll be happy when….” not realising that happiness is not something that is put off to a future date, rather it is something that can be only had in the present moment.

There is also this notion that WE make others happy, and when they are happy, we are happy.

Truth is that everyone’s happiness is in their own hands. There is no way you can make someone else happy when they themselves have chosen to not be happy. In the same way, you also choose to be unhappy when the ones you love are unhappy.

I know all the above. And mostly it has changed my entire outlook on life! I no longer live for the happiness of others- I live for my own happiness. And amazingly everyone I love started to take care for their own happiness. Or maybe they always did and I never realised it because I believed so deeply that my actions or non-actions were creating or destroying their happiness….

Got To Watch Movie!My happiness is my responsibility. Your happiness is your responsibility. I don’t mean to be crude, it is simply more empowering to take up the responsibility for your happiness- it gives the power back to you instead of it being in the hands of others or at the mercy of outside situations.

Having said all the above I have to a huge extent let go of my sense of responsibility toward the happiness of the people around me. They have, whether they realise it or not, made choices that have brought them to where they are- happy or unhappy. I am here to help them regain their happiness-yes. I am here to be responsible for their happiness-no.

Over the past two weeks I have been a bit ill and in a resistance that I couldn’t quite understand.

My sister had been at my home for that time and…. I was still holding the responsibility of my sister’s happiness. I was still going out of my way to make her happy… and I berated myself when things didn’t go well and when I thought she’d be unhappy or upset. I slipped back to living for someone else’s happiness. And my entire body resisted it.

My sister seemed to be fine. Not unhappy at all. It was all in the imaginings of my own mind.

As I started to drop off the responsibility I unnecessarily took on, I began to feel in flow… I started to live for my own happiness again and I started to be healthy again too.

Your happiness is your choiceHave you taken the responsibility for your own happiness?

Or does it lie in the hands of a loved one? (What kind of pressure are you placing on your loved one to make you happy??)

Or is your happiness a victim to circumstance? (The world outside has an effect so great upon you that you are no longer in control of your own emotions??)

Do you hold the responsibility of another’s happiness in your own hands? (Are you really allowing them to live an empowered and independent life? Or are you teaching them to be dependent upon you for their happiness??)

May you always be Happy!




(Pictures courtsey: Pic 1- my own ; Pic 2- doralook.edublogs.org ; Pic 3- fastcompany.com )


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. potatosandwich
    Sep 08, 2011 @ 08:24:32

    Is it our duty to keep ourselves happy? Indeed. Is it our duty to help others find happiness? Yes indeed. It’s like the old saying, “I find happiness in your happiness”. Can work well, my kids and wife are a prime example, their happiness means everything to me. On the other hand, I have been guilty of “going along” with friends and family with regards to their happiness, even if it means I don’t agree…why? This was the right thing at the time, we should not ignore our worldly responsibilities, sometimes at a minor cost to us.

    Try and find happiness in the small things….each day I walk through the door from work, my youngest stands there and babbles on for a good 5 mins, try, in baby talk, to explain his day at nursery – it brings great joy and happiness to me….cool.

    All the best


    • Shil Rani
      Oct 03, 2011 @ 19:58:28

      I cant believe I didn’t see this comment, much less reply to it!! I’m so sorry!

      I totally agree. It is our duty to help others find happiness. Whether they choose to or not is totally up to them. I also think that at times life calls to us to make a compromise, but usually we are not the only ones.. the person on the other side should be meeting us half way. It keeps a balance in life and the relationship…

      Life is all about the little things that bring us joy.. We end up looking back and realizing that those are really the big things in life!

      Hugs! Thanks for your insight!


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